★
We are thoroughly fed up by the presentation of autistic narratives from the point of view of put-upon parents. It’s a trope as crass as it is offensive. By all means if you want to write a work about families ‘dealing’ with disabled children you have A Day in the Death of Joe Egg and everything that comes after it.
As an autistic audience member, to watch parent characters argue about how hard it is to raise an autistic son, how they talk ad nauseam about routines and behaviour with sighs and pulled-hair, is insulting. Our Boy was an excruciating watch for me. Although the show is not without merit. Dorian Todd, the young autistic actor who plays Joe, the son, acts well, and is great that his talent is being nurtured by Building Blocks Collective, the company behind the show.
It was writer Helen Hammond’s decision to focus on the parents and not the son, to give him hardly any opportunity to speak in his own voice, to have agency, I found infuriating.
Angela Milton’s exhausted mother and Kareem Nasif’s unconvincing absent father trying to reconnect with his son, were given far too much time to indulge in ideas that we have seen far too often, reinforcing negative stereotypes about what it is like to have an autistic child.
For all its misconceptions, the fact that the play hangs against the backdrop of their son’s sexual assault is done sensitively, it had a bold and unflinching quality in its honesty that gave some tension to parts of the play.
Ultimately, this isn’t a play for autistic people, it is a play for the parents of autistic people, and that should be clearly stated, otherwise it unfairly represents us.
